In spite of the lovely warmth, I don't like spring for several reasons. Soon the snow will melt, and the trees will decide that they feel compelled to poop pollen everywhere. If you've ever met me, you know that pollen might as well be arsenic to my immune system.
I can't breathe for entire months at a time. My eyes look like I'm a meth addict. I eventually resort to making strange noises in an attempt to scratch my throat. It is very disturbing.
And then, as if that weren't bad enough (subjunctive mood, anyone?), spring decides to turn into summer. And summer is my absolute least favorite time of the year. Now, if I lived in California, in a nice beach house, I would love summer. But in the lovely state we call Minnesota, summer only means mosquitoes, humidity, and loads of people swimming in lakes and chlorine infested pools, both of which I'm allergic to.
If I had my way, we'd skip spring in Minnesota all together. A month of summer, nine months of fall. Why fall? Because fall is perfect. Colorful, brisk, but not freezing, and allergy free. Add it to a Manhattan sky line and we've achieved heaven on earth.
Add enough winter to cover Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the New Year. Ba-boom! We've achieved a perfect climate.
Love to you all!
Lissa Hoarn
I will have to completely disagree with you on this cousin. Having no allergies to speak of, Spring is my absolute favorite time of the year. Summer here is great, we have hardly any mosquitoes even though we have so much water. The humidity coupled with the temperature is a killer though.
ReplyDeleteself-applauding your proper use of the subjunctive mood makes your writing seem even more pretentious than usual, i'll have you know :)
ReplyDeletefor me, last summer barely had any mosquitoes and many lovely moments of peaceful lake swimming where my friends and i were the only ones out there. if only you had the idea of being gloriously tan to look forward to.
who knows, maybe someday you will have enough money to jet set between east and west coast all the time!
Dude, maybe you need to move. Sometimes people move to another climate and their allergies go away. Didn't that happen Sheryl?
ReplyDeleteYou may need to try out a few locations, but I'd recommend starting with Chicago.
"...happen TO Sheryl?" rather. My bad.
ReplyDeleteyes it happened to me, but I think that it has to be Bozeman for it to work ;) Im not even allergic to dogs here, and I used to be deathly allergic to them.
ReplyDeleteSheryl: I think the dog allergy just might have been in your head, if the move to another climate changed that. I don't think climates affect pet allergens.
ReplyDeleteMatt: Chicago sounds like the perfect place to start. I'll start looking for condos in your area tomorrow.
It was not in my head!!!!
ReplyDelete